So back in the halcyon days of October 2024, when the phrase “for profit cage match on the white house lawn” had not yet been uttered by serious journalists, I took scissors to a sweater that had languished in the back of my closet since about 2015. I didn’t like the length, so I chopped it off.

This was, according to some of the internet’s more ridiculous busybodies, an absolute scandal. How very very very dare I modify a piece of my own clothing from my own closet so that it suited me better (rather than, apparently, either continuing to not wear it or giving the [then nine year old, already once mended] sweater to someone else to make better use of)? What an outrage… (If you want to watch the original snip, it’s here and here on instagram, with an early update on how it held up here, and later chapters here, here, and here.)

After the chop (and despite the scolds berating me for ruining a perfectly good sweater), it went from nearly never worn to being in the heaviest imaginable rotation. (Cough, as did the two other sweaters that got a similar modification, cough, it’s almost like I am a competent adult who can be trusted to modify pieces of my own wardrobe in a way that suits my current needs, cough.)

And now, after 20 months of constant wear, it has suffered an elbow blow out. This is not unexpected! My left elbow always wears out quickly (I think it’s something to do with how I use my computer), and I knew it would eventually happen if I wore the sweater enough (insert eloquently arched eyebrow here and point it at the busybodies). And, in a stroke of tremendous foresight and impressive stash management, I managed to both save the bits I cut off and locate them when needed. Which means it’s about time to give this sweater some elbow patches…so it can last for another few years of heavy wear.