This is a digital download (a PDF), not a physical object.

Patrons at any level get this pattern for free as part of their membership, and they get a bunch of other patterns too! Here’s a preview of the free patterns you get a the Sheer Nonsense level ($3), the Utter Nonsense level ($6), and Rampant Nonsense level ($12).

There comes a point in every knitter’s life (cough, or at least in this knitter’s life, cough) where everything is awful. None of your projects are making your brain do the happy thing. Absolutely everyone in your life is astonishingly annoying (yourself included). The whole world feels like it’s on fire. And you can’t do a damn thing about any of it.

When this day comes upon you, I highly recommend taking a moment to knit something absolutely absurd. The tinier and more nonsensical, the better. You want something you can complete in one sitting and that you can then strategically deploy in such a way as to make someone else’s day significantly weirder.

It helps. I don’t know why, but it really, really, really does. I promise.

And I’m pretty sure knitted marshmallows are the perfect project for this task. You can make one of the tiny ones in less than an hour with just a few yards of yarn. And they’re tiny enough and amusing enough that I suspect you’ll find no end of ways to sneak them into someone else’s day (tuck them in someone’s favorite mug? hide them on top of the emergency chocolate bar stash? put a pile of them next to the hot cocoa?).

I know they made my day better. I very much hope they’ll do the same for you.

General information

This 18-page pattern is tremendously detailed and holds your hand every step of the way. There are pages and pages of step-by-step photos to show you exactly what to expect as you work. The pattern is full of helpful tips on everything from casting on, blocking, filling your marshmallow, and managing your ends.

It’s almost absurdly detailed, but it really does mean you can totally make these, even if you’ve never knit a project like this before!

Skills & scope

Each marshmallow fits in the palm of your hand and takes very little time to knit. The knitting is delightfully mellow, almost entirely stockinette in the round with just a few decreases to close up the ends.

The pattern uses charts, so you will need to know how to follow a knitting chart.

Yarn, gauge & sizing

The pattern comes in four sizes, and you can make them in anything from fingertip size (about the size of real marshmallows) up to something almost as big as a coffee cup.

I made mine in worsted-weight yarn held double with fluffy lace-weight yarn (to create different shades of toastiness), but you can make it in any weight of yarn, and the finished size will change depending on what yarn you use. You don’t need to match any particular gauge, but you do need to knit tightly enough to make a firm fabric so your filling doesn’t show through.

You can absolutely use scrap yarn for this.

The marshmallows in the pictures took less than 50 yards of yarn, less than 15 yards for the smallest ones.

Tools & supplies

You’ll need needles that let you work in the round (circulars or DPNs) in whatever size lets you get a firm fabric with your chosen yarn plus the general knitting tools you need for most projects (scissors to cut your yarn, a darning needle to weave in ends, the occasional stitch marker or bit of scrap yarn to hold stitches).

You’ll also need something to fill the marshmallows with (I used bottle caps in mine, they’re perfect). I have a page here with information about the supplies I use in my projects.

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